checkmarks

This pretty much sums up our life right now. And these are just the lists that we haven't lost.

Things have been crazy around here. Crazy. Curtis accepted a job offer in Greensboro, NC a few weeks ago. Since then, we have been constantly (and frantically?) trying to get the house ready to put on the market. Full days and short nights... one thing to the next.

Just tonight, we compiled all of our unchecked down to this list. Things are getting better. More manageable.

I realized, though, that this is the way I live my life... as a giant checklist, just trying to get from one box to the next. Sure, there is something so satisfying in marking each little square and moving forward. What is lost, though, is the life that's lived in between the boxes. The moments that don't achieve a checkmark but whose experience would fulfill me in a much deeper way. Laughing with my little boy. Sitting with my husband on the couch and simply enjoying being together. Calling my sister just to say "hi". Taking time to be still and know that He is God.

Today was a big day, and not just because of the surprise snow. Finally, we were able to put a sign in our yard. Our house is on the market.

My mentality lately is that "once the house is ready", or "once the house sells", or "once Christmas is over", I will be able to be more present in life. I will be able to breathe and enjoy the air. But will I? Or will I just create a new list?

A lot of life exists between the list items. If I can figure out a way to live it right now, in the midst of this season, I should be able to do it at anytime. If...